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Terrible Calaacals

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Maanta, i got a B in Calculus. My dad told me I might as well quit school and stand in a welfare line. Calaacal

Calaacal! (29) - May Allah help you (12)

Dec 16, 2011 01:53 PM - School - by Zamzam (woman)

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Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I've been watering for almost 2 years is a fake.... damn society got me again. Calaacal

Calaacal! (34) - May Allah help you (11)

Dec 16, 2011 11:04 AM - Miscellaneous - by Young Night (man)

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Maanta, the guy that I have been dating left me. His excuse was that I couldn't make Somali shaah which means I'm not sweet. What? Calaacal.

Calaacal! (14) - May Allah help you (11)

Dec 16, 2011 12:53 PM - Love - by Shamso Balaq (woman)

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Today, I found out that everyone in my family thought that this one red toothbrush was theres, and that the five of us have been using the same one for days. Calaacal

Calaacal! (28) - May Allah help you (10)

Dec 16, 2011 01:49 PM - Family - by Calaacal King (man)

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Maanta, I gave two Somali girls a ride. They thought I was west African so they kept saying "jareerkan ilahay aa noo so direy" I left their ungrateful asses on the highway. Calaacal

Calaacal! (31) - May Allah help you (8)

Dec 16, 2011 01:45 PM - Somalis - by Mo (man)

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Today, my aabo changed his mind about letting me study abroad next semester even though I’ve already been accepted into the program. His reason? Someone has to pick up the kids from dugsi and he’ll be busy..sleeping. Calaacal

Calaacal! (1) - May Allah help you (7)

Jan 1, 2012 12:45 AM - Family - by jama (man)

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Today, I went to meet up with a group of friends and one of them happens to be my crush for 3 years. I was chatting and flirting innocently with him until he told me ''abaayo you have hilib stuck in your teeth.'' I wanted to die. Calaacal

Calaacal! (8) - May Allah help you (7)

Jan 12, 2012 12:04 PM - Love - by Jameelah (woman)

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Maanta, I noticed I am only attracted to girls who are stronger than me physically. Too bad none of them like me since they all want a guy who is stronger then them. Calaacal

Calaacal! (18) - May Allah help you (6)

Dec 16, 2011 01:44 PM - Love - by Salah (man)

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Maanta, I was craving those Mexican chips so i begged my friend to buy me some. She did. Then I remembered I was fasting. Calaacal
'

Calaacal! (2) - May Allah help you (6)

Jan 10, 2012 09:02 AM - Friends - by Amirah (woman)

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Today, one of my friends tried to convince me he was 21 when he is clearly in his mid-40's. Another tried to convince me that he was made of pork. Actually MADE of pork. I'm friends with these idiots. Calaacal

Calaacal! (29) - May Allah help you (5)

Dec 16, 2011 11:03 AM - Friends - by Young Night (man)

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Maanta, after 5 years, she broke up with me. She said she is marrying her cousin. Calaacal

Calaacal! (3) - May Allah help you (5)

Dec 24, 2011 08:47 PM - Love - by aniga (man)

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Maanta, I went to the doctor and found out I was lactose intolerant. Aabo decided to make me feel better by buying me my favorite type of ice cream. Calaacal.

Calaacal! (4) - May Allah help you (5)

Jan 1, 2012 12:45 AM - Family - by farhiya (woman)

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